When you get a divorce over 50, it’s likely that you’ll have adult children who will worry about what’s happening. You may not think that the divorce will affect them, but you should know that even in adulthood, children can be affected by what’s happening.
Psychologically, adult children of divorce may worry about choosing sides or having to deal with awkward holidays. They might worry about becoming a messenger between you and their other parent or think that they could have done more to help.
Your children may struggle with the idea that your relationship ended, especially if they saw your relationship with the other parent as a pillar of strength or stability in their lives.
Financially, your divorce may impact them, too. Since your divorce could have a significant impact on your finances and retirement, you’ll need to look into things like your estate plan to make sure that your children are still inheriting what you wanted to leave to them or that you have enough coverage for your retirement that you won’t have to rely on them for financial support.
Adult children have concerns about divorce, too
Since adult children often have concerns about divorce, it can be helpful to talk to your child about what to expect in the coming weeks and months as you work toward settling your divorce. If there are situations that you believe they need to know about, such as changes to estate planning or your retirement, then you can bring them into those conversations.
Remember, you’re still their parent, so it’s not a good idea to rely too heavily on your children for emotional support. They’re going through this divorce too, even though you aren’t having to worry about custody or other issues you’d deal with if you had younger children. You still need to make sure that your children understand that you will be there for them regardless of the divorce. Be a voice of reason, and do your best to show that you can get through a divorce and move on. Your relationships may change, but this is just a new phase of life that your children will need to adapt to.
