Money is a major issue if you decide to divorce. Yet it is also a common reason for divorce.
One report found that money is the primary thing couples argue about. Yet couples argue about many things, so why is arguing about money such a high indicator of divorce?
The arguments may be the surface representation of deeper differences
You come back from the supermarket, pleased that you have everything to feed your family for the week. Instead of thanking you, your spouse hits the roof because you paid too much for the fish.
When they do this, they may not really bothered by the amount you spent. They may be expressing anger over deeper-rooted issues. For example:
- Stress over struggling to pay the bills every month
- Anger that they let you convince them to buy a house you could barely afford
- Frustration that you always spend more than they think necessary
- Frustration that you still have not got a better paying job
- Regret because they met you and had kids and will now never afford to do what they planned
Our attitudes about money are often so deeply rooted that it can be hard to resolve differences. For example, if you grew up seeing your parents work three jobs to put food on the table, you may feel guilty about frivolous spending. If your spouse grew up in a household where money was never an issue, they might be frustrated that you do not let them spend as they wish. Each other’s attitude to money may grate over time.
If you realize that getting a divorce might be the only way to resolve your money difference, get legal help to understand more.